It's been seven years. Seven years since I've held you, touched you, kissed you. My arms are so empty without you and my heart aches for you. I love you and I will hold you in heaven my sweet baby Joshua.
I have so many things to share about this whole journey. Things I've kept inside. It's been painful but beautiful at the same time. That probably sounds strange but God's love, strength and mercy were evident seven years ago and still are even today.
If I could go back in time and choose not to experience the birth of Joshua, knowing that he would quickly return to Jesus, I would not change a thing. Even though I only knew him for nine short months, and losing him was the deepest, darkest, most unbearable pain I have ever felt, I wouldn't give up one moment that we had together.
Someday I'll tell the story as I remember it.
Joshua Stephen Carpenter, November 4, 2003
6 months ago